You may know, but if not, I lost one of my soulmates, Charlie, while living here in this cabin in Tujunga. This insanely intelligent and stubborn and loyal and loving little mutt. My travel companion, my best friend, my heart. Still no closure, over one year later. Yesterday at perhaps the worst possible timing I saw a dog running down my street as I was scurrying off to run overdue errands just hours before my dear friend was flying in for a quick weekend reunion. Of course I had to stop. And this pooch jumped right into my car! With 89 things left to do that day and after running on a long stretch of roughly 3 hours of sleep per night I was overwhelmed and drained in every possible way. Knocked on a neighbor's door where I heard voices. Long story made (slightly) shorter, despite a few unfortunately stressed and frustrated folks (myself included), both a local neighborhood and several online social communities came together conucurrently to reunite this guy with his family. My heart swells with joy for this guy who got a second chance with his family, but I'd be lying to say it didn't also reignite the raw ache for Charlie.
Lesson learned? Life happens. Deal with it. Take the time. Do the right thing. Even if it's insanely inconvenient. Even if it rips open a deep emotional wound. When did we become so selfish? Help each other out. Be kind. Focus on your shit. Try not to judge others. Set boundaries and don't make exceptions. Inner happiness comes with true inner confidence. When you feel good about the decisions you've made that day, ESPECIALLY on your worst day, the happiness and love follows.
Helping a stranger is a tragically overlooked but sai believe (single girl here!) an all-telling sign of someone's character. A mere exchange of words and/or currency between your interest and those in the service industry can reveal a rainbow of characteristics in your partner. Most importantly, respect, boundaries, and generosity. Pretty big deals in a committed relationship. These themes will follow you both throughout your lives, so I suggest you solidify your own personal opinions before trying to come to a mutual agreement with a potential life partner on such main themes. If you're not being your authentic self? If you question yourself as to why you're trying to bend and contort your mental and physical body to fit into someone else's vision? Just go. Continue on. I'm still a hopeless romantic, don't get me wrong. And I always will be, it's a part of me that I love and embrace. I've learned to love my scarred yet open heart. But I have learned the hard way...over and over and over again. Recently in a rapid-fire sort of test battle, it seems. Too often I give my partner the benefit of the doubt. I have a bleeding heart and when it bleeds, it gushes. Takes my breath away. But as my tattoo says, 'c’est la vie'. Lessons learned. Hearts broken. Hearts rebuilt. Stronger and truer than ever,
My heart beats for me. My heart beats for you.
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